1. Listen to him. Surprise! Men need to talk things through, too. If we’re not careful, conversations with our husbands can look like a game of wack-a-mole where we are beating down every word that comes out of their mouths! Whether it’s a challenge at work or a suggestion he has about how to re-organize the kitchen: hear him out.

2. Don’t over analyze him.  This one is especially hard for us to do.  We can make the mistake of thinking that there is some underlying thing going on in his mind.  The plain and rather profound truth is that men are simple, what you see is generally what you get.  I know it’s hard to understand because we ourselves are so complex and complicated, but it’s true. Embrace it!

Her Diary:

Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird.  We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it. Conversation wasn’t flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn’t say much.  I asked him what was wrong; He said ‘Nothing.’ I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said he wasn’t upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it.  On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly and kept driving.  I can’t explain his behavior I don’t know why he didn’t say ‘I love you too.’ When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore.  He just sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent.  Finally with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes he came to bed.  But I still felt that he was distracted and his thoughts were somewhere else.  He fell asleep- I cried.  I don’t know what to do.  I’m almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else.  My life is a disaster.

His Diary:

Motorcycle won’t start, can’t figure out why.

3. Make time for him.  We are busy running kids here and there, meeting friends for coffee, participating in ministry events. We often  over-fill our calendars.  This leaves little or no time to just be with our husbands.  This can have the effect of them feeling neglected. But we need to be available to them! This involves intention on our part.  For further help in this area check out Eric’s article Will You Say ‘NO’ This Year?

4. Pray for him.  This is a given, I know, but so easily overlooked. I know I am guilty of letting this slip off of my priority list. What better way to bless our husbands than to call on the only One who knows them perfectly and wants what is best for them. Daily, we need to bring our husbands before the Lord and ask for protection over their health, their heart, wisdom in their work, and leadership of the family.  Pray that God will use your husband mightily in ministering to others in his life. One of the best books I’ve read on this is The Power of the Praying Wife.

5. Finally, tell him the truth.  What I am referring to here is reminding him of the truth of the Gospel. We are all surrounded by discouragement and stress everyday.  We all need to be reminded of our identity in Christ as it provides the basis for living for him! If you haven’t already, check out our resource Who are you? as it encourages simple meditation on our identity in Christ and can guide you in praying for your husband and others.