He Turns My Sorrow into Eager Waiting

He Turns My Sorrow into Eager Waiting

Another negative pregnancy test. I sobbed on the floor of my bedroom, struggling with the waves of sorrow crashing over me. After almost a year and a half of trying to get pregnant and still the disappointment was like a knife in my heart. This time though was worse.

As I wept I felt my heart break and shatter. The tears falling from my eyes seemed to be draining away every last vestige of hope I had within me. I felt hollow and broken. “I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep trying.” After all our efforts, it just wasn’t enough, nothing was working. “Is this what you want God? This hopeless empty feeling? Is this what waiting is?

Am I supposed to just keep waiting like this, trapped in helpless limbo, hoping and praying for you to notice my pain and despair and have pity on me? What do I do God, when you ask me to wait on you, and to keep waiting, and keep waiting? How do I keep going?” Hesitantly I got up off the floor and opened the Bible. I turned to my reading for the day. Romans 8. Verse 23 says, “And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the first fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies.”

As I read, comfort crept into my soul and slowly I felt hope returning and this time it wasn’t based on fertility options, on figuring out the exact right thing to do. This was more, so much more. The words wait eagerly leapt off the page at me. Oh how I longed to be like that, with a living passion in the here and now, no matter what waiting was before me!

How do I live life eagerly while I live in this waiting? I needed to know, I needed to taste it in my very soul. So I dove into the word and I searched for days. And the verses came and washed across my soul with a living hope.

Galatians 5:5. ”For through the Spirit, by faith, we ourselves eagerly wait for the hope of righteousness.”

Is it that easy? That the Spirit through faith in Christ works eagerly waiting inside me? But what about the times when I don’t feel any eagerness?

1 John 3:2. “Beloved we are God’s children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared but we know that when He appears we shall be like Him, because we shall see Him as He is.” One day, I will be like Him and one day I will see Him. That in and of itself causes eagerness and hope to spring forth in my heart.

When my focus is on Him and the hope of life with Him, all the waiting of this life dims in comparison. I believe He really can teach my heart to eagerly wait on Him instead of this empty waiting I automatically tend to do on my own. I can identify with the father who begged Jesus for mercy on his demon-possessed son in Mark 9; “Lord I believe, help my unbelief!” Waiting in helpless situations seems to be a theme in my life, but I am learning that I don’t have to wait with emptiness or lack of hope. My circumstances might not change but my heart has. I can keep going because life with its sorrow and trials will not last forever and He will help me keep my eyes focused on the hope that never fails me and on the life that lasts.

Psalm 42:1-2. “As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the Living God, When shall I come and appear before God?”

Psalm 130:5-6.  “I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word I hope; my soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen for the morning, more than watchmen for the morning.”

Lord, let that be my desire, let that be my hope. You turn my waiting into eagerly waiting. You Lord are worth the wait.

Ruth and John live in Virginia and attend small group with the Wallace family.
Four Things That Will Greatly Bless your Wife

Four Things That Will Greatly Bless your Wife

My wife is not indestructible. Is yours?

Most men want to minister to their wives but struggle to know how best to do that. We think it is one of these complicated “Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus” things. I have good news. It really is easy to bless our wives. Thankfully, our wives are much better at seeing effort and appreciating heart than we probably are. So, a little effort goes a long way.

Pray for her, daily.

Leslee is the first person on my list to pray for each day. If you struggle to remember to pray for your wife, or struggle to know how to pray for her, simply write her name on a 3×5 card along with a few specific prayer requests and put it in your Bible as a bookmark for your daily devotions. Or put the card on the dash of your car and pray for her on your way in to work. Remind her regularly that you are praying for her and how you are praying for her.

Date her regularly.

Dating is not a nice-to- do. It is a must-do. The more kids you have or the more complicated and stressed out your lives are, the more necessary it is to do this. When we initiate dates, regularly, it demonstrates that we love our wives and that our marriage is a priority. Further, our wives are deep thinkers. For us to truly minister to them, we have to mine those depths. This requires time and intentionality that in these hyper-busy times is usually only possible when you break the routine and set aside time to just be together by yourselves.

Take notes—literally.

Perhaps this sounds weird, but consider starting a journal for your marriage. Purchase a simple notebook that you can write down the issues you discuss with your wife. Issues that are important to her (and you, too) and that you need to take time to think about, research the scriptures, and/or pray about. Doing this helps demonstrate that things that are important to her are also important to you.

Write her love notes.

You do not have to be Shakespeare to write a meaningful note to your wife. Writing a simple note that communicates your love and appreciation and leaving it for her to find will be a huge encouragement.

The marriage relationship is vital to the health of a Christ-honoring home and the church. How we love our wives sets an example that will likely be followed by our children—one way or another. Being intentional about developing and protecting the marriage relationship is an investment that will pay eternal dividends.